Kinchi

I haven't been here for soo long...sorry. And I deleated all 99 deviations in my inbox, too lazy to go through them all. Sorry again! If it's something you really want me to see, send me a note with the URL.

As for Keisuke...I ruined everything. He was outside when I was heading for his house, and he was with Run (Pronounced "rune" a lot of Americans call him "run" as in jogging. >.<. They were just playing Nintendo DS. When Keisuke saw me apporoach, he had the weirdest look on his face. He actually looked kind of afraid. I sat down next to Run and Keisuke and watched them play that stupid gaming system for about half an hour, then I remembered that I left Keisuke's birthday present at home (His birthday was on July 1st). So I just ran off (We weren't saying anything to each other anyways, Keisuke wouldn't look at me, and Run was just following his lead) and burst into my house, grabbed it, and ran back. Figuring it was super hot outside, I was all sweaty and gross by the time I got back. Luckily, they hadn't moved yet, so I ran up to Keisuke, who was still igonoring me, hit him on the head with his present (Box of cookies, I gave some to him every day during the school year), told happy birthday, and ran off. Hitting him on the head is something I always do, that's how I got him to sign my yearbook. I don't know why, but it's cute hitting Keisuke with stuff and seeing his expression afterwords. He goes "Aa! Kyushyo!" and then when he sees that it's me, looks all weird again. I don't blame him for not talking to me, though, since he's so shy. He's already left by now though, and I'll never see him again.

I'm going to see the movie Hagane no Renkinjutsushi Shambara wo Iku Mono (Fullmetal Alchemist and the Conqueror of Shambala) on the 27th of July. I can't wait!

Hmm, I don't have much else to say...

Visit her!

Oh, and I'm going to start using Japanese again. ^^

---------------------------------------------
私は... 残念のためにそう長くここにいなかった。そして私はそれらすべてによって行くには不精な私のポストのすべての99 の偏差を離れて除かれて、余りにも得た。残念再度! それが何かなら実際に私に送る私にURL が付いているノートを見てほしい。

それらは公正でありNintendo DS をする。彼が私が近づくのを見たときに彼は彼の表面の最も不可解な一見を有した。彼は実際にちょっと恐れている見た。私は彼の友人の隣で私は家で彼のバースデー・プレゼントを残したことをそれから私が覚えていたか約するためにそれらを30 分のためのその愚かな賭博システムを愛し、見たかだれ坐り、(彼の誕生日は7 月1 日にあった) 。そう私はちょうど(私達は互いに何もとにかく言い、彼は私を見し、操業は公正であり、逃げ彼の鉛に続く) それつかまれた私の家への破烈は動き。それを計算することは極度の熱い外側だった、私が戻ったまでに私は完全にsweaty および総体だった。運よく、それらはまだ動いていない、従って私は衝突まで誕生日おめでとうを言われ、逃げた彼の現在(クッキーの箱、私は学年の間に毎日彼にいくつかを与えた) が付いている頭部の彼を動かした。頭部の彼に当ることは私が常に何か、それ私が彼を私の年鑑に署名するためにいかに得たかであるである。私は知り、それがかわいいなぜがか原料との彼に当り、彼の表現のあと書きを見る。彼はアンペア時"行く! ののしりは!" そして次にそれは私であることを彼が見るとき、完全に不可解に再度見る。私は、けれども私に話さないことにおいて彼がとても内気であるので、彼を責めない。彼は既にしかし今ごろはもう残て、私は決して彼にまた会わない。

Tomorrow, I promise that I will knock on Keisuke's door and talk to him. I totally convinced myself today, but when I walked up to his house, no one was home. That was probably the only time I felt confident enough. I'm going to go off to sulk now.

Keisuke is moving to Hawaii on the 16th, but will be moving out of our town to a hotel closer to the airport probably tomorrow.

I keep trying to track him down, but it's difficult since he's hardly ever at home anymore. I want to tell him how I feel, or at least tell him to have a nice trip, but I'm too afraid to knock at his door. I had my whole script down:

Me: Keisuke-kun wa irasshaimasu ka?
Whoever answers the door: Hai. Oi, Keisuke!
(Keisuke comes)
Keisuke: Yumi-chan...
Me: Gokegen Ikaga.
*glomps Keisuke*

HA! I wish. I saw Keisuke's brother Tomokazu a few days ago, but he didn't see me. He's so cute...ahem. I don't have any photos of him, though.

I'm just rambling...

I'm really worried Keisuke's going to leave before I have the chance to say goodbye though...and I'm too shy to call him or knock on the door. I want to just happen to run into him, but that's not happening...what do I do?

I don't know whether I made my life better today or completly destroyed it.

Okay, school's been out for a while. I went to the swimming pool a few days ago and I saw Keisuke there with his brother, Tomokazu. So, I've been going to the pool every day since then. XD Keisuke is there most of the time, but we don't talk. Why? I don't know. It was so easy to talk to each other in school, but for some reason I have to force out a "Konnichiwa" to him because I'm so embaressed. At school, it was easy. At the swimming pool, where we're wearing pratically nothing, it's REALLY hard. He hasn't said anything to me, and I haven't said anything to him.

Today was Keisuke's birthday.

My family was planning to go to the water park, but I begged them to stay behind with my brother who is a lifeguard. I didn't know whether Keisuke was there or not, but I was willing to wait all day to see if he showed up. The swimming pool is open from 11:00 AM to 7:00 PM. I headed over there at 1:00 AM, because that's when the day begins to get hot. I waited two hours for him to show up.

And he did.

Now, you see, my brother know's about how I feel about Keisuke, and he kept bugging me to confess. He said, "If he moves, you'll probably never see him again. So what do you have to lose?" So I barely mangaged to say, "Happy birthday, Keisuke." His reaction was just a smile and a nod. After that, my brother and his friend started to cheer across the pool, saying "Whoo! Go Yumi!" It was sooo embaressing. A hint to him that I have feelings for him. After that, my brother told all the lifeguards at the swimming pool I liked Keisuke.

I basically spent the whole day just watching Keisuke...and he stared at me back. And his brother, too. When I smiled at Keisuke, he turned away, and his brother just kept staring. It creeped me out.

On my way home (I walked there), I met someone else who knows how I feel. She  said, "Yumi, say goodbye" because Keisuke was nearby. I looked at him, and then hormones got the best of me and I fled. Then she yelled, "Keisuke! Yumi says goodbye!". Then she started to tell Tomokazu's FRIEND how I felt about Keisuke. So by now, Keisuke probably knows.

I'm afraid to go back.

I'm not going to do a Japanese version of this journal today...

In a few days I'm going on an hour drive up to an orphanage. The kids there painted one of the walls white and a bunch of people are going up there to do paintings. I was selected. What I plan to do is bring a bunch of mangas and let the kids choose what they want on the wall. Can't wait!

I haven't seen Keisuke all summber. -.- I want to go to the movie Hagane no Renkinjutsushi Shambala wo Yukumono with him and Kai, but I don't know how to contact them. I have their phone numbers (Thanks to that person that talks on the phone when you press "0") but I'm to embarressed to call them. Wouldn't it be weird to just pop up one day and ask someone to go to the movie with you? Hm.

Sorry I haven't been very active. I've just been really busy. You see, I'm making a blog. I finished the layout, I just have to get it hosted. I'll be sure to give you the URL when it's done. ^^